Uncovered in glory

EFL
TEAM	WINS	LOSSES	PCT.	GB	RS	RA
Old Detroit Wolverines	106	49	.687	—	895.8	605.3
Flint Hill Tornadoes	100	55	.645	6.5	854.9	633.6
D.C. Balk	96	58	.626	9.5	881.8	681.3
Kaline Drive	96	59	.618	10.7	825.5	649.4
Peshastin Pears	92	63	.595	14.2	793.9	666.4
Canberra Kangaroos	85	69	.550	21.3	821.0	754.9
Cottage Cheese	85	70	.549	21.4	852.3	788.0
Haviland Dragons	82	73	.526	24.9	801.7	787.6
Pittsburgh Alleghenys	82	73	.526	24.9	764.5	723.4
Bellingham Cascades	79	76	.510	27.4	657.7	645.3
Portland Rosebuds	78	77	.506	28.1	835.0	835.3

 

OLD DETROIT: L, 3 – 4. (64 PA, .233, .281, .333; 5 ip, 1 er, 1.80 ERA)  Pitching!  Good pitching!  Finally!  Thank you Shane McClanahan, for getting well and off the IL fast!  Thank you, Bellingham, for the trade! Finally the W’s can earn a win… except the offense sagged yesterday, in ways Wolverine allocations couldn’t dodge. The Wolverines have been racing for the pennant by standing still lately. Not a glorious way to end the season. 

 

 

FLINT HILL: L, 2 – 5.  (65 PA, .153, .231, .322;  3.3 ip, 0 er, 0.00 ERA) The Wolverines are lucky our league’s Tornados are, by far, the kindest, most empathetic tornadoes in all of creation.  Seeing the Wolverines struggle would stimulate most tornados to rush in and pile ruin on ruin.  But the Flint Hill Tornadoes, whom I have been (erroneously) calling Flinties, have joined the Woeverines in the last few days in their undistinguished play.  I mean, look how similar the two teams’ lines were: # of PAs, general shape and low altitude of the offensive line, thin but good pitching.  Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery — and, in this case, enabled the Wolverine to stink without consequences in the standings.

 

 

DC: “L”, 1 – 1. (47 PA, .154, .283, .282; 6 ip, 0 er, 0.00 ERA).  Same song, third verse… Bryce Harper homered, so there’s a highlight. Eli Morgan pitched better than any Wolverine or Tornado.  Judging by yesterday’s results, the Balk should lead the sorry pack atop our league — but the whole pack should be deep in the league’s second division. 

 

KALINE:  W, 2 – (-4).  (48 PA, .349, .417, .535  – Happy Edgar Martinez Day! ;  10.3 ip, 4 er, 3.50 ERA).  Here’s a team worthy to be champions!  It’s a good thing for the W’s that the EFL isn’t a law school class, where your entire grade is based on the final exam.  If it were, the Drive would be making law review and getting the juicy clerkship.  No, the EFL is definitely an undergraduate fantasy league, where you can seal your A with weeks left in the semester and coast right on out… 

PESHASTIN:  W (-1), L 2;  6 – 15.  (36 PA, .290, .333, .452;  7 ip, 10 er, 12.86 ERA).  A solid day at the plate led by Mike Zunino (2 for 4 with a homer) and Jazz Chisholm (2 for 5 with a double) distantly echoes the Drive. But the pitching looked like something from one of our league leaders.  Huascar Ynoa stank (4.7 ip, 7 er) and Justus Sheffield stank worse (1 ip, 3 er).  Even a strong 1.3 innings, 0 ER from Kendall Graveman couldn’t stave off a double loss. 

CANBERRA: L, 1 – 8.  (29 PA, .148, .172, .333;  1 ip, 1 er, 9.00 ERA)  Here’s another team looking to the wrong role models.  That EFL Leader-style batting line, despite Kyle Tucker’s home run and Austin Meadows’ triple, combined with a poor outing by reliever Caleb Smith, leads to this result. That lead the Kangaroos patiently built over the Cheese almost entirely disappeared in one day. ‘

 

COTTAGE: W, 7 – 1.  (37 PA, .324, .378, .618;  15.6 ip, 4 er, 2.31 ERA)  The Cheese played in a style more reminiscent of the Drive than anyone else above them in the standings.  Shohei Ohtani helped shred the Mariners with two triples and two walks in 5 PA.  Trea Turner blasted two homers — if a guy as small as Turner can do that, what’s everyone else’s excuse?  Sean Manaea finished 7 very strong innings, marred only by a solo home run. Robbie Ray was almost as good over 6 innings, also with only 1 ER. 

HAVILAND: W, 8 – 7.  (38 PA, .378, .395, .486;  5 ip, 3 er, 5.40 ERA).  If only the Dragons had found a full 7 innings of solid activated pitching, they could have been in the Kaline/Cottage mold.  As it is they fell between that level of excellence and the putrescence marking our top teams.  The Dragons hit like true champions would, led by Brandon Lowe’s three doubles and a single in 5 PA. Tarik Skubal pitched well, if not long: 4 ip, 0 er. But Domingo Tapia undid that good work with his 0.3 inning, 3 er, nonuple chulk.  

PITTSBURGH:  L, 5 – 15. ( 25 PA, .190, .320, .476;  11.3 ip, 18 er, 14.21 ERA).  The Alleghenys hit better than any of the top three teams, but somehow pitched worse than any team in the league. Tyler Anderson, who probably sank the good ship Mariners in the AL Wild Card race with his 2 ip, 9 er horror show, also at least temporarily and barely sank the good ship Alleghenys in the race with the Dragons.  He got help from three other pitchers (Crowe, Bender and Gutierrez) who combined for 8.3 innings an 9 earned runs. 

 

BELLINGHAM:  W, 4 – 2. (39 PA, .278, .333, .361;  4 ip, 0 er, 0.00 ERA).  Troubled by the Rosebuds suddenly appearing right on their foothills, the Cascades took a seismic leap forward yesterday.  The Cascades got decent hitting, led by Kyle Farmer’s two doubles and a HBP, and Bryan De La Cruz’s 3 for 4 with a walk. And they got great but thin pitching from four relievers. 

PORTLAND:  L, 5 – 7.  (37 PA .182, .270, .394; 8.7 ip, 6 er, 6.21 ERA)  After Friday’s games, the Rosebuds had the best September record in all of baseball, their 16 – 6 being a sliver better in winning percentage than the Cardinals, who had won 14 in a row. The Cardinals won their 15th in a row yesterday, led by the Rosebuds’ center fielder Harrison Bader, who did all of the following:

 

* Homered

* Doubled

* stole two bases

* scored 3 runs

* drove in 2 runs

* got an assist in a routine, Cubs-rally-killing 3-2-5-4-2-8-6 8th inning double play.

You’d think Hader’s hand in the Cardinals’ 15th straight win would help the Rosebuds win, too.  But the rest of the ‘Buds suddenly tried to act like an EFL-leading team, so of course they could not keep up with the Cardinals.  Their moment in the sun dimmed, and they slipped back toward .500.

 

But not all the way. Considering the month they’re having there’s still every reason to hope the R’s can finish above .500, as long as they quit trying to be like one of the top three teams in the league.

 

 

 

AL East
TEAM	WINS	LOSSES	PCT.	GB
Old Detroit Wolverines	106	49	.687	—
Flint Hill Tornadoes	100	55	.645	6.5
Tampa Bay Rays	96	59	.619	10.5
Boston Red Sox	88	67	.568	18.5
New York Yankees	88	67	.568	18.5
Toronto Blue Jays	86	69	.555	20.5
Baltimore Orioles	50	105	.323	56.5

NL East
TEAM	WINS	LOSSES	PCT.	GB
D.C. Balk	96	58	.626	—
Canberra Kangaroos	85	69	.550	11.8
Atlanta Braves	82	72	.532	14.5
Philadelphia Phillies	81	74	.523	16
New York Mets	73	81	.474	23.5
Miami Marlins	64	90	.416	32.5
Washington Nationals	64	91	.413	33

 

AL Central
TEAM	WINS	LOSSES	PCT.	GB
Chicago White Sox	87	68	.561	—
Pittsburgh Alleghenys	82	73	.526	5.5
Bellingham Cascades	79	76	.510	7.9
Cleveland Indians	76	78	.494	10.5
Detroit Tigers	75	79	.487	11.5
Kansas City Royals	70	84	.455	16.5
Minnesota Twins	69	86	.445	18

NL Central
TEAM	WINS	LOSSES	PCT.	GB
Milwaukee Brewers	93	62	.600	—
St. Louis Cardinals	86	69	.555	7
Cottage Cheese	85	70	.549	8
Cincinnati Reds	80	75	.516	13
Chicago Cubs	67	88	.432	26
Pittsburgh Pirates	57	97	.370	35.5

 

AL West
TEAM	WINS	LOSSES	PCT.	GB
Kaline Drive	96	59	.618	—
Houston Astros	91	64	.587	4.8
Seattle Mariners	85	70	.548	10.8
Oakland A’s	84	71	.542	11.8
Haviland Dragons	82	73	.526	14.2
Los Angeles Angels	74	81	.477	21.8
Texas Rangers	56	99	.361	39.8

NL West
TEAM	WINS	LOSSES	PCT.	GB
San Francisco Giants	101	54	.652	—
Los Angeles Dodgers	99	56	.639	2
Peshastin Pears	92	63	.595	8.7
Portland Rosebuds	78	77	.506	22.6
San Diego Padres	78	77	.503	23
Colorado Rockies	71	83	.461	29.5
Arizona Diamondbacks	50	105	.323	51