The entire AL Central was snowed out yesterday. On the ides of April. I suspect we are approaching some kind of record for early season postponements, and the havoc this will create later. But that’s just the tip of the iceberg, so to speak, when it comes to the oddness in the air this season.
| EFL | ||||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB | RS | RA |
| Canberra Kangaroos | 9 | 5 | .612 | — | 73.0 | 58.1 |
| Kaline Drive | 9 | 7 | .573 | 0.4 | 74.4 | 64.2 |
| Brookland Outs | 8 | 7 | .545 | 0.9 | 79.7 | 72.8 |
| Pittsburgh Alleghenys | 6 | 5 | .543 | 1.1 | 57.0 | 52.3 |
| Haviland Dragons | 8 | 8 | .506 | 1.5 | 74.5 | 73.6 |
| D.C. Balk | 7 | 7 | .487 | 1.8 | 57.3 | 58.8 |
| Portland Rosebuds | 7 | 8 | .476 | 1.9 | 62.8 | 65.8 |
| Cottage Cheese | 7 | 8 | .468 | 2.1 | 68.5 | 73.1 |
| Old Detroit Wolverines | 7 | 8 | .458 | 2.2 | 54.1 | 58.8 |
| Flint Hill Tornadoes | 6 | 9 | .411 | 2.9 | 58.4 | 69.9 |
| Peshastin Pears | 5 | 10 | .345 | 3.9 | 55.1 | 75.9 |
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Canberra: W, 8 – 5. (.333, .429, .583 — Happy Edgar Day!; 0.7 ip, 1 er). I suspect MLB has set a record for games postponed in the first 1/11 of a season. I certainly don’t remember another episode like this. Very strange. Also very strange: this dogged clinging to first place by the Kangaroos. They have staved off all comers for nine days now, 11 of the last 12. Starling Marte’s monster Sunday — 5 for 5 with a homer — was the key to the Kangaroo’s win.
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Kaline: DNP, (-1) – 0. (.143, .208, .333; o pitching). Still hanging around very close to the top, the Drive took their snow-out seriously. Only 7 players showed up for what amounted to a desultory batting practice.
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Brookland: L, 5 – 9. (.250, .294, .438; 4.3 ip, 0 er). Zack Godley was more like god-awful, going 4 ip with 5 er, leading to some slippage in the Outs’ position in the standings, at least in terms of games behind the lead.
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Pittsburgh: DNP (-2) – 1. (.174, .240, .174; 6 ip, 4 er). I wish I had time to do a little study: I am convinced this is the worst EFL April ever, offensively. I doubt I’ve managed to offend anyone yet! Nor are our offenses giving much offense. Especially odd, consider the Allegheny’s offensive line Sunday, which strikes me (without looking) as being almost the median daily offense in the EFL now.
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Haviland: W 1, L (-1), 5 – (-8). (.385, .556, 1.000 — Happy Edgar Day!; 7 ip, 0 er). In one of the best days for any EFL team this year, the Dragons soared all the way from 10th to 5th place in a single day — even though only 4 Dragons appeared at the plate! And Bryce Harper only went 1 for 2! (The one was a homer, and he walked 3 times, too.). The Dragons give hope to all us bottom-dwellers.
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DC: W, 4 – 2. (.217, .250, .478; 5.7 ip, 1 er). Dylan Bundy might be shaping up as a starter, after all these years of disappointment. He’s running a 1.40 ERA on the season, only lowering it a little with Sunday’s performance. First Matt Chapman turns into a slugging super-slick third baseman (now OPSing 1.053 even after Felix held him to 0 for 3 plus a HBP), now Bundy becomes an ace after the rest of the league sort of gave up? The more the Balk do this, the more troublesome they are going to be in the pennant race.
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Portland: W, 6 – 2. (.182, .435, .375; 9 ip, 2 er). That .182 batting average looks pretty good to the rest of the league, but it is all just a disguise. Of the 23 PA the Rosebuds mustered yesterday, 7 were walks. Of the three hits, one was a homer. Toss in a 2.00 ERA and you have a strong win.
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Cottage: W, 5 – 2. (.286, .412, .286; 13.7 ip, 4 er). Another win, almost as strong, built on patience at the plate and Sean Manaea mowing down Mariners (7 ip, 1 er).
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Old Detroit: W, 5 – 4. (.250, .341, .389. 0 pitching). Ninth place. New low! The W’s leading hitter now is Mallex Smith, replacing the suddenly collapsing Nick Ahmed. After blowing up on the mound Saturday, all Wolverine pitchers were sent on personal retreats Sunday to re-examine their lives. We’ll see if we have a staff left today.
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Flint Hill: L, 2 – 6. (.143, .182, .143; 1 ip, 0 er). The planet may be warming, but the the early season is freezing, and so are most of our hitters’ heinies. How are we supposed to manage with a third of our players not playing, and another third “playing” but not playing? It’s not our fault, we sub-Cheesian teams. It’s the cosmos conspiring against us.
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Peshastin: L, 2 – 7. (.167, .167, .167; 1.67 ip, .167 er). Actually, one of those stats — only one — is incorrect. It should be a 0. See if you can figure it out. Otherwise we’ll just call the Pears, with their .167 winning percentage, the Peshastin 1/6ers.
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Combined MLB + EFL Standings for 2018
| AL East | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Boston Red Sox | 13 | 2 | .867 | — |
| Toronto Blue Jays | 9 | 5 | .643 | 3.5 |
| New York Yankees | 7 | 7 | .500 | 5.5 |
| Old Detroit Wolverines | 7 | 8 | .458 | 6.1 |
| Flint Hill Tornadoes | 6 | 9 | .411 | 6.8 |
| Baltimore Orioles | 5 | 11 | .313 | 8.5 |
| Tampa Bay Rays | 3 | 12 | .200 | 10 |
| NL East | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| New York Mets | 12 | 2 | .857 | — |
| Philadelphia Phillies | 9 | 5 | .643 | 3 |
| Canberra Kangaroos | 9 | 5 | .612 | 3.4 |
| Atlanta Braves | 8 | 6 | .571 | 4 |
| D.C. Balk | 7 | 7 | .487 | 5.2 |
| Washington Nationals | 7 | 9 | .438 | 6 |
| Miami Marlins | 4 | 11 | .267 | 8.5 |
| AL Central | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Minnesota Twins | 7 | 4 | .636 | — |
| Cleveland Indians | 8 | 6 | .571 | 0.5 |
| Pittsburgh Alleghenys | 6 | 5 | .543 | 1 |
| Detroit Tigers | 4 | 8 | .333 | 3.5 |
| Chicago White Sox | 4 | 9 | .308 | 4 |
| Kansas City Royals | 3 | 10 | .231 | 5 |
| NL Central | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Pittsburgh Pirates | 11 | 4 | .733 | — |
| St. Louis Cardinals | 9 | 7 | .563 | 2.5 |
| Brookland Outs | 8 | 7 | .545 | 2.8 |
| Milwaukee Brewers | 8 | 8 | .500 | 3.5 |
| Chicago Cubs | 7 | 7 | .500 | 3.5 |
| Cottage Cheese | 7 | 8 | .468 | 4 |
| Cincinnati Reds | 2 | 13 | .133 | 9 |
| AL West | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Los Angeles Angels | 13 | 3 | .813 | — |
| Houston Astros | 10 | 6 | .625 | 3 |
| Seattle Mariners | 8 | 5 | .615 | 3.5 |
| Kaline Drive | 9 | 7 | .573 | 3.8 |
| Haviland Dragons | 8 | 8 | .506 | 4.9 |
| Oakland A’s | 6 | 10 | .375 | 7 |
| Texas Rangers | 6 | 11 | .353 | 7.5 |
| NL West | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Arizona Diamondbacks | 11 | 4 | .733 | — |
| Colorado Rockies | 9 | 8 | .529 | 3 |
| Portland Rosebuds | 7 | 8 | .476 | 3.9 |
| San Diego Padres | 7 | 10 | .412 | 5 |
| San Francisco Giants | 6 | 9 | .400 | 5 |
| Los Angeles Dodgers | 5 | 9 | .357 | 5.5 |
| Peshastin Pears | 5 | 10 | .345 | 5.8 |