I spent some time yesterday watching videos of backyard volcanic eruptions in Hawaii. I was stuck by two things especially: how vigorously molten rock can bubble, and how quickly it cools from a fiery bright red to hardening black when it spatters out of the caldron. It only takes a few seconds.
The entire league is standing around waiting to see if the Outs will c0ol as quickly. Because if they don’t, this sudden eruption in our own backyard will burn down or engulf all our carefully constructed plans.
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EFL Standings for 2018
| EFL | ||||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB | RS | RA |
| Brookland Outs | 29 | 17 | .629 | — | 254.0 | 196.8 |
| Old Detroit Wolverines | 25 | 17 | .584 | 2.4 | 178.8 | 151.3 |
| Canberra Kangaroos | 26 | 18 | .581 | 2.4 | 203.4 | 172.8 |
| Portland Rosebuds | 25 | 20 | .559 | 3.3 | 207.1 | 183.3 |
| Flint Hill Tornadoes | 22 | 20 | .521 | 5.1 | 178.5 | 170.8 |
| Kaline Drive | 24 | 23 | .512 | 5.3 | 212.3 | 207.5 |
| Cottage Cheese | 23 | 23 | .510 | 5.5 | 242.5 | 237.1 |
| Pittsburgh Alleghenys | 20 | 24 | .460 | 7.7 | 229.5 | 250.6 |
| Haviland Dragons | 21 | 26 | .448 | 8.4 | 190.5 | 211.2 |
| Peshastin Pears | 19 | 26 | .429 | 9.1 | 189.3 | 221.2 |
| D.C. Balk | 17 | 27 | .396 | 10.5 | 173.3 | 216.1 |
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Brookland: W, 5 – 4. (. 229, .321, .354; no pitching). The league got a glimmer of hope Saturday when the Outs hit meekly, like pretty much every other EFL team.
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Old Detroit: “W”, 2 – 4. (.125, .236, .271; 27.3 ip, 9 er). Andrew Heaney actually surrendered 4 runs Saturday, but they were all unearned. And it’s not like Heaney is getting a break here. They really weren’t Heaney’s fault. In the top of the second, Heaney struck out Out Christian Arroyo — a VERY good thing to do these days. He got the next batter to pop out. Then he issued a charitable walk to rookie Johnny Field. Wolverine Mallex Smith followed with a wimpy grounder wide of first. Jefrey Marte ranged to his right, picked up the ball, and instead of making an easy throw to second, turned around and made a slowpitch softball underhand throw way over Heaney’s head for an error. Heaney walked the next batter to load the bases, then got a visit to the mound. Which didn’t help at all: the next batter blasted a home run.
Clearly the problems here were Marte and the meddlesome mound visit. The NEXT Batter was Out C.J. Cron. Heaney struck him out on three pitches.
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Canberra: W, 8 – 8. (.237, .326, .605; 12.7 ip, 8 er). The Kangaroos would be back in second place if it weren’t for Steven Matz’ 4 ip, 4 er start. Either that, or Greg Holland’s triple-chulk relief appearance (2/3 of an inning, 2 earned runs). Probably Holland is the most to blame: he’s been a mess all season. Jose Abreu certainly did his part to salvage a very narrow win: 3 for 3 with a double, homer and walk.
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Portland: L, 4 – 7. (.162, .244, .514; 3.7 ip, 5 er). Jon Gray did all that pitching, It and some lackluster hitting by a few people, undid a remarkable offensive display: four Rosebuds turned in identical batting lines: 1 for 4 with a homer and a strikeout. These four were: Mookie Betts, Carlos Correa, Paul Goldschmidt, and Gleyber Torres.
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Flint Hill: “W”, 5 – 5. (.270, .317, .432; 2.3 ip, 4 er). Archie Bradley chulked (1 ip, 2 er) and Tanner Scott sextuple chulked (1/3 of an inning, 2 er) to undermine a decent day at the plate, especially by Khris Davis, Marcus Semien, and Yangervis Solarte, all of whom went 2 for 5 with a double. (Solarte showboated a little by hitting TWO doubles.)
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Kaline: “L”, 3 – 2. (.245, .302, .286; 15 ip, 3 er). James Paxton pitched a complete game with only 2 earned runs allowed to overcome replacement-level hitting by the so-called Drive. I say “so-called” because, of their 12 hits (in 40 at bats), only two were doubles.
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Cottage: L, 5 – 6. (.268, .311, .463; 17 ip, 12 er). Another case of doing ok in one aspect (in this case, hitting) and messing up in another (in this case, starting pitching). Danny Duffy, formerly no-hit pitcher Sean Manaea, and Luis Severino combined for 15 ip and 12 er. That’s a 7.20 ERA, nearly indistinguishable from replacements. How does Mike Trout (2 for 4 with a double and a homer) stand having his efforts wasted so often — by the Angels most of his career (including yesterday, when they were joined by the Cheese)?
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Pittsburgh: L, 3 – 8. (.277, .31, .468; no pitching). No pitching is no problem most of the time, but not in this case. The Alleghenys are now carrying 8.3 innings of replacement relief and 4.9 innings of replacement starting pitching. You see the results in those 8 runs allowed.
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Haviland: W, 7 – 3. (.250, .302, .500; 11.3 ip, 5 er). Here’s what happen when you get good work on both offense (especially Gary Sanchez’ 4 for 5 with a double and rwo homers — that’s a 3.000 daily OPS) and pitching (especially Sean Newcomb’s 6 ip, 1 er). Really the only mar on the day was John Axford’s nonuple chulk (0.3 ip, 3 er). And being in 9th place. I guess most Dragon fans would see that as a mar on their day.
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Peshastin: L, 1 – 5. (.184, .214, .192; 4.7 ip, 2 er). I teased the Drive for their powerless batting yesterday. But here’s a team with half the power of the Drive — a lone double by fresh-off-the-DL Clint Frazier. That and Zach Eflin’s ok outing (4.7 ip, 2 er) were the “highlights” for the Pears Saturday.
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DC: L, 3 – 9. (.218, .326, .351; 2 ip, 4 er). Jarlin Garcia Satuirday was far from the outstanding performances he provided earlier in the season. That chulk was entirely his. The hitting wasn’t fantastic, other than Andrew Benintendi’s 2 for 3 with a homer and a walk. But it had no chance to secure a win with a chulking Garcia on the mound.
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Combined MLB + EFL Standings for 2018
| AL East | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| New York Yankees | 29 | 13 | .690 | — |
| Boston Red Sox | 31 | 15 | .674 | — |
| Old Detroit Wolverines | 25 | 17 | .584 | 4.5 |
| Flint Hill Tornadoes | 22 | 20 | .521 | 7.1 |
| Tampa Bay Rays | 22 | 22 | .500 | 8 |
| Toronto Blue Jays | 22 | 24 | .478 | 9 |
| Baltimore Orioles | 14 | 31 | .311 | 16.5 |
| NL East | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Atlanta Braves | 27 | 17 | .614 | — |
| Philadelphia Phillies | 26 | 17 | .605 | 0.5 |
| Canberra Kangaroos | 26 | 18 | .581 | 1.4 |
| Washington Nationals | 24 | 20 | .545 | 3 |
| New York Mets | 22 | 19 | .537 | 3.5 |
| D.C. Balk | 17 | 27 | .396 | 9.6 |
| Miami Marlins | 17 | 28 | .378 | 10.5 |
| AL Central | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Cleveland Indians | 22 | 22 | .500 | — |
| Pittsburgh Alleghenys | 20 | 24 | .460 | 1.8 |
| Detroit Tigers | 20 | 25 | .444 | 2.5 |
| Minnesota Twins | 18 | 23 | .439 | 2.5 |
| Kansas City Royals | 14 | 31 | .311 | 8.5 |
| Chicago White Sox | 12 | 30 | .286 | 9 |
| NL Central | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Brookland Outs | 29 | 17 | .629 | — |
| Milwaukee Brewers | 28 | 18 | .609 | 0.9 |
| Pittsburgh Pirates | 26 | 19 | .578 | 2.4 |
| St. Louis Cardinals | 24 | 19 | .558 | 3.4 |
| Chicago Cubs | 24 | 19 | .558 | 3.4 |
| Cottage Cheese | 23 | 23 | .510 | 5.5 |
| Cincinnati Reds | 16 | 31 | .340 | 13.4 |
| AL West | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Houston Astros | 29 | 18 | .617 | — |
| Seattle Mariners | 26 | 19 | .578 | 2 |
| Los Angeles Angels | 25 | 21 | .543 | 3.5 |
| Oakland A’s | 24 | 22 | .522 | 4.5 |
| Kaline Drive | 24 | 23 | .512 | 4.9 |
| Haviland Dragons | 21 | 26 | .448 | 7.9 |
| Texas Rangers | 18 | 29 | .383 | 11 |
| NL West | ||||
| TEAM | WINS | LOSSES | PCT. | GB |
| Portland Rosebuds | 25 | 20 | .559 | — |
| Arizona Diamondbacks | 25 | 20 | .556 | 0.2 |
| Colorado Rockies | 25 | 21 | .543 | 0.7 |
| San Francisco Giants | 23 | 24 | .489 | 3.2 |
| Peshastin Pears | 19 | 26 | .429 | 5.9 |
| Los Angeles Dodgers | 19 | 26 | .422 | 6.2 |
| San Diego Padres | 19 | 28 | .404 | 7.2 |